Author: Michael Morris

The University of Wisconsin at Madison experienced some diversity turbulence last fall when its homecoming committee produced a promotional video that “showed students — almost all of them white — cheering at football games, eating pizza, dancing, and singing a cappella” (Chronicle of Higher Education, January 2, 2020).

Unfortunately, the Badgers can’t seem to get out of their own way.  On Monday, it was revealed that a recruitment brochure devoted to the University’s undergraduate major in Cheese Studies only displayed photos of American cheese slices that were white or orange.  

“This is an outrage,” claims Wenona Stemwinder, co-chair of the Student Dairy Coalition, an advocacy group on campus that addresses cow-related issues.  “Couldn’t the University’s PR Department have put together a brochure that more fully reflects the incredibly rich tapestry of cheese in today’s world?  Let’s face it, a slab of American white cheese is basically a Ku Klux Klan robe in edible form.  And what says “I love Donald Trump” more than orange cheese?

“Why couldn’t there have been at least one photo of a wedge of bleu cheese, or was this cheese’s mixed color deemed to be too multi-racial for our uptight University Administration?  And what about Velveeta and Cheez Whiz?  Are those varieties too ‘low-class’ for our snooty campus?  Hell, people in this state inhale fried cheese curds, the most disgusting food on the planet!  

“Of course, a photo of Swiss cheese would have been out of the question, since the holes might remind us of the frayed social fabric that deepening economic inequality has wrought upon our nation.  When will the Cheese Studies major at the University of Wisconsin begin pursuing a path of social justice, rather than continuing to serve as an instrument of oppression?”

The Chancellor’s office at the University has not responded in detail to the recent controversy, but it did release a statement on Tuesday stating that “the University of Wisconsin at Madison is committed to offering a Cheese Studies major that welcomes all students who wish to utilize their passion for cheese as a means of advancing the public interest.  Access to high-quality cheese products should be everyone’s birthright, regardless of race, creed, color, or national origin.”

Amen to that, and may the Havarti be with you. 

 

Disaster was narrowly averted on December 19th at Greybill-Turleen College in Lima, Ohio when Campus Police Chief Theodore “Ted” Frazley misinterpreted a decision by the institution to eliminate majors in Art History and Sociology. 

The Chief, a veteran of Operation Desert Storm in Iraq, heard the announcement at a meeting of the College Cabinet on the morning of the 19th.  Afterward, he immediately dispatched the Police Sniper Squad to “terminate with extreme prejudice” all current students they could find who were majoring in Art History or Sociology.  

Fortunately, the Fall semester had recently ended, and the only student they came across was an Art History major sitting on a bench in the quad, waiting for his Senior Honors Project to dry (an oil painting of Tony Bennett and Lizzo performing a duet).  The student was wounded in the leg and is in stable condition at the Greybill-Turleen infirmary.  The officer involved will not be charged, and the College will pay a settlement to the student and his family.

“We literally dodged a bullet on this one,” Frazley sighs.  “If it had been the middle of the semester, there would have been carnage all over campus.  Next time, I hope my academic colleagues remember that a “major” can refer to a person as well as a course of study.  I shouldn’t have to tell them this.”

No, Chief Frazley, you shouldn’t.  

President Spivey: “With the holiday season almost here, I am thrilled to report that freshman enrollment at Caribou increased nearly 60% this fall when compared with last year.  And our endowment has grown by over $7 million in the past 18 months.  It has been a terrific……yes, Marvin, do you have a question?”

Professor Marvin Squabb: “Enrollment in our Scrimshaw Carving major hasn’t budged over the past decade.  Why isn’t the College doing more to advertise the program?  I never see a billboard highlighting this major.”

President Spivey: “There are only three billboards in all of Aroostook County, Marvin, and two of them are reserved for the opioid epidemic.  Scrimshaw Carving is a hard major to sell in this economy.  You and your colleagues in the Whaling Department might want to consider developing some new programs.”

Squabb: “Maybe we could do that if the conference room in our building wasn’t so cold that we can’t meet there.  The thermostat on the wall hasn’t registered more than 52 degrees since September.  We called Maintenance three times last week, but the custodian just comes over, stares at the temperature display, punches it with his fist, grunts, and leaves.  Students who take make-up exams in that room have to wear a parka, mittens, and a ski mask; they look like Arctic Terrorists.  The Director of Facilities won’t even let us use a portable space heater there.”

President Spivey: “You know full well that a defective space heater burnt down Craven Hall last winter.  The faculty from Craven are now residing on the quad in a bunch of pierogi and falafel food trucks.  Would you like to join them?  You also know that the $31 million donation we received in June from Garth Brooks is financing a magnificent new faculty office building that will house you and your colleagues next fall.”

Squabb: “But I like the view of the landfill from my current office!  I don’t want to move.  Why can’t we stay where we are if we want to?  You never surveyed the faculty about this!”

President Spivey: “We need to raze your building to make space for the $15 million student recreation center that the Maine legislature just funded.  It’s going to be a state-of-the-art facility.”

Squabb: “I heard that it will only have two racquetball courts.  The LA Fitness club in Presque Isle has four.”

President Spivey: “Do you even play racquetball, Marvin?”

Squabb: “No I don’t, but that’s not the point.  The point is that….”

President Spivey: “Let’s move on.  A grateful Caribou graduate has just endowed annual faculty awards of $25,000 each for teaching excellence and scholarly achievement.  The first awards will be given in the spring.  Nominations are due by March 1^st.

Squabb: “That’s not nearly enough time for faculty to assemble their application materials.  And I hope they don’t base the teaching award on student evaluations.  They’re incredibly unfair.  Students hate it that I require them to read Moby Dick in the original Latin, so they penalize me on those surveys.  And for years I’ve asked for an on-campus facility to house the blue whales I need for my scholarly work, but the Faculty Research Committee keeps turning me down.  They’re discriminating against me because I’m white.”

President Spivey: “Marvin, everyone at Caribou State College is white.”

Squabb: “That’s exactly my point.  We’re all being discriminated against.”

President Spivey: “I’m not sure I understand your logic, but since you brought up the topic of race, I’m excited to announce that President Barack Obama and Michelle Obama will be Distinguished Visiting Lecturers in our Political Science Department next semester.” 

Squabb: “Why couldn’t we get Harry Truman or Ronald Reagan?  Those were real Presidents!”

President Spivey: “They’re both dead, Marvin.”

Squabb: “Like that’s my fault?”

President Spivey: “It’s nobody’s fault.  I just think we should focus on the wonderful opportunity that the Obama visit will give us to….”

Squabb: “Why has compensation for supervising Independent Studies only gone up $3 per credit in the past five years?  I’m working with 14 seniors this fall, and it’s very time consuming having to go on whale watches every weekend because I don’t have my own whales.  I couldn’t even make it to my daughter’s bagpipe recital in Littleton last Friday because I was……”

The transcript ends here.  According to Campus Police, President Spivey leapt from the stage and a scuffle ensued.  The President suffered a minor scrimshaw wound.  Charges are pending.

In a full-page ad in the December 6th issue of The Chronicle of Higher Education, Babson College announced that it would use a $50 million gift to establish the Arthur M. Blank School for Entrepreneurial Leadership on its Wellesley, Massachusetts campus.  The founding principles for the School will be the six core values espoused by Mr. Blank, a Babson graduate:

— Put People First

— Listen and Respond

— Include Everyone

— Innovate Continuously

— Lead by Example

— Give Back to Others

Enter Bentley University, Babson’s fierce rival located just seven miles up the road in Waltham, Massachusetts.  Bentley’s response?  In September 2020 it will launch the Bernie Madoff Institute for Business Excellence, which will offer both undergraduate and graduate degrees.  Delivering a sharp slap in the face to the Blank School, the Madoff Institute has developed a half-dozen core values of its own.  To wit:

—  Profits matter.  People do too, but not as much.  Not nearly as much.  For the love of God, are you serious about making money or not?

—  When you choose to listen to people, all you end up hearing is a bunch of crap.  Talk more.  And talk loud. 

—  Including everyone takes a lot of time, and you don’t have a lot of time.  Keep just about everybody out of the loop, including your family.  Soliciting  other people’s opinions will only hold you back from achieving the destiny you deserve.  

—  Innovation is indeed crucial.  If a week goes by and you haven’t developed a new Ponzi scheme, you’re not doing your job.  

—  Being a “role model” or “leading by example” is a game for losers who believe that high visibility is an adequate substitute for stealth, deception, and the occasional well-placed stiletto when accomplishing tasks.  Stay in the shadows, make things happen, and be sure to wipe down that dagger with a damp cloth before tossing it in the pond.  

—  Sure, you can give back to others.  But why in the f**k would you want to do that?  This is a business school, not a convent.  Here’s the phone number for Doctors Without Borders.  Have a good life. 

In a press conference devoted to the Madoff Institute, Bentley President Alison Davis-Blake proclaimed that “our graduates will be prepared to crush those Babson wusses in the blood-soaked arena of entrepreneurial competition.  We’re sledgehammers, and they’re overripe tomatoes.  Bring.  It.  On.”

Dr. Davis-Blake wore a black bandana around her forehead, tied at the back, and her cheeks were adorned with tattooed crimson thunderbolts.  She delivered her comments from a steel cage used for Ultimate Fighting Championship matches.  

Bring it on, indeed. 

 

 

Financially troubled Cincinnati Christian University will close at the end of the Fall 2019 semester (no joke).  Among the Hail Mary passes it launched to save the school as the game clock ran down was, ironically, the establishment of a football program.  Pass incomplete.  Game over.  

If only CCU had followed the path of tiny Flemingsburg Bible College in eastern Kentucky, it might have survived.  Plagued by declining enrollment over the past several years, Flemingsburg scored a heavenly coup when it announced on Tuesday that God the Father (yes, that God the Father) will join the faculty as a Distinguished Visiting Lecturer for the Fall 2020 semester.  

“We’re overjoyed,” exclaims Dr. Gwendall Cistern, Flemingsburg’s President.  “The Almighty will be teaching four courses for us that semester.  It’s a heavy load, to be sure, but He is God, after all, and we won’t expect Him to publish or serve on any committees.  He’ll also coach the women’s field hockey team, but that’s something he volunteered for.   He will reside on campus in Eden Gardens, our graduate student housing complex.”

Here are the four Special Topics courses that God will offer in Fall 2020:

Biology 710  The Creation: An Insider’s Perspective — An in-depth analysis of how the Almighty multi-tasked during the seven days He fashioned the universe.  Will go far beyond the basic details provided in the Book of Genesis.  The course will be accompanied by an exhibition, at the college’s art gallery, of never-before-seen photos from that fateful week.  The longstanding question of what God did on the Seventh Day (His “day of rest”) will also be answered.  (Course can be taken with lab [4 credits] or without lab [3 credits].)

Philosophy 651  The Ethics of Tragedy — Why does God allow horrible things to happen to innocent people (e.g., typhoons, childhood leukemia, earthquakes, Lou Gehrig’s disease, chronic dandruff)?  In this course the Almighty will explain His reasoning.  Required Prerequisite:  Psychology 342  Mood and Behavior.  

Theology 531  Eternal Happiness — What do people actually do in heaven?  Is it perpetually daytime in the firmament, or are there evenings as well?  Do residents ever sleep?  What about haircuts, meals, and public transportation?  Are Netflix and HBO available?  If so, do heaven-dwellers get to see the new season of “The Marvelous Mrs. Maisel” before folks on earth do?  All these questions, and more, will be addressed. 

Metaphysics 317  Second Thoughts — An examination of decisions made by the Almighty that He believes don’t look so terrific in hindsight.  Topics have yet to be finalized, but are likely to include the following: baseball’s designated hitter rule, Twitter, mosquitoes, the Ivy League, and white people.  

The Fall 2020 semester will also feature guest lectures by the original Mary and the Holy Ghost, to be held in the Corinthians Amphitheater. 

SCHEDULE 

October 15th, 8:00 pm  An Evening with Mary: Question and Answer Session on the Immaculate Conception

November 12th, 9:00 pm  The Holy Ghost: My Life as a Dove

December 3rd, 7:30 pm  An Evening with Mary II: Challenges in Raising a Gifted Child

Applications to Flemingsburg for Fall 2020 have increased eight-fold when compared with those for Fall 2019.  Details concerning the Almighty’s compensation have not been disclosed, but as President Cistern notes, “having God on campus for an entire semester is a bargain at any price!”

 

True Fact:  In a recent Chronicle of Higher Education article on diversity/inclusion challenges at the University of Iowa, an anonymous staff member observed that finding a partner can be difficult for a single person of color in a largely white environment.

A significant problem, to be sure.  But a little creativity can go a long way….  

Consider, for example, the University of Maine at Orono, a school located in one of the whitest states in the nation.  Beginning in September 2020, any faculty member of color who has been at the University for at least two years without finding a partner of color will be provided, free of charge, with a white spouse.  

According to University spokesperson Henrietta Kayak-Pine, “we’re not talking about connecting you with some random white person who’s been living alone in a yurt at Baxter State Park for the past decade, subsisting on alpine bearberry leaves and pond algae.  These folks will be thoroughly vetted professionals who’ll bring something of value to the relationship.  White people can make fine spouses, as long as you choose them carefully.  Sure, my husband Earl is an absolute jerk, but that’s not because he’s white, it’s because he’s a guy.  His idea of a night out for the two of us is sitting in our Ski-Doo in the driveway during a blizzard, eating Slim Jims and listening to a Lynyrd Skynyrd cover band on his transistor radio.

“All of the spouses provided by the Orono program will be graduates of a three-week summer training institute that focuses on how to be a good husband or wife, both inside and outside of the bedroom.  And you’ll know their score on the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator (MBTI) before meeting them.  I’m just sorry that Earl never had the opportunity to participate in this training.  We’d both be a lot happier, and I probably wouldn’t have shot him in the leg last winter.

“Let’s be honest.  Although the racial demographics of the United States are shifting dramatically, Maine is likely to remain 95% white until at least the year 3000.  Convincing people of color to come to a place where 15% of the population marry caribou, and the state dessert is snow-on-a-stick, is not easy to accomplish.  We must do more.”

Indeed, you must.   

True Fact:  According to the Boston-based Online Learning Consortium, college professors are vulnerable to “neuromyths,” which are erroneous beliefs about learning that are based in misunderstandings of how the brain functions (e.g., the mistaken belief that a student learns best when taught by an instructor who employs the student’s preferred learning style).  

As it turns out, faculty neuromyths are not confined to their perceptions of students.  Here are some other examples:

“My department chair hates me!”  Reality:  Your department chair doesn’t hate you.  There’s a big difference between your chair hating you and your chair simply not caring about you.

“My dean hates me!”  Reality:  Actually, this one is true.  Sorry.

“The Provost has no idea who I am!”  Reality: The Provost does know who you are, but, as is the case with your department chair, doesn’t care.  

“The custodian is stealing change from my coin dish when he cleans my office!”  Reality:  It’s much more likely that your underpaid, non-unionized graduate assistant is doing this. 

“The reference librarians gossip about me behind my back whenever I visit the Circulation Desk!”  Reality:  You know that librarians are notoriously quirky.  They’re probably just sharing naughty limericks about the Dewey Decimal System.  It has nothing to do with you.  

“Servers in the Faculty Dining Room give me smaller portions at lunch than they give my colleagues!”  Reality:  Have you looked at yourself in a mirror lately?  They’re doing you a favor. 

“A Campus Police officer ‘keyed’ the side of my car with a corkscrew from his Swiss Army knife!”  Reality:  No, that would be your graduate assistant again. 

“The IT Department doesn’t like me.  It takes them a month to respond to my urgent Help Desk requests!”  Reality:  It takes them a month to respond to every Help Desk request.  They’re not singling you out. 

“The University’s Core Curriculum Committee is prejudiced against me!”  Reality:  Their rejection of your Special Topics course proposal — Blackface on Stage, Screen, and Fraternity Row: A Sentimental Journey — was mandated by the section of the school’s anti-racism policy that governs role-playing by faculty and students in class.  It had nothing to do with you personally. 

“At the All-Faculty Assembly last week, my colleagues appeared uninterested — or even worse, annoyed — when I attempted to discuss the unwarranted parking tickets I’ve been receiving on campus.  Dammit, no one EVER uses that part of the quadrangle lawn next to the Chemistry building!”  Reality:  This perception could be true.  University Life recommends that you pay the tickets. 

Have a healthy cognitive day. 

 

In ancient times, having a professor/mentor write a recommendation letter on your behalf was a pretty straightforward deal: you asked, and the professor said either yes or no (usually the former).  However, a step was added to the process a number of years ago.  In this incarnation, the professor responds to your request by asking you to prepare what is essentially a draft of the recommendation, which the professor will then review and presumably revise before sending it to a graduate school or potential employer.

The public rationale for this practice emphasizes the ability of a self-generated draft to produce a more fine-grained account of the applicant’s experiences, strengths, and characteristics than would otherwise be the case.  Of course, one can convincingly argue that such a detailed description is what personal statements are for.  But let’s not quibble over technicalities.  The real reason for self-generated drafts is that it reduces the professor’s workload.  We shouldn’t embarrass ourselves by pretending that this ship doesn’t sail in ethically compromised waters. 

Against this background, University Life is pleased to offer draft-writers five suggestions to help make the final versions of the recommendations produced by their references credible and compelling on an individual level, and not so similar to one another on a collective level that they generate undue suspicion among readers.  To put it in psychometric terms, one wants the inter-rater reliability of these communications to be high, but not too high.

Suggestion 1:  Identify related but distinct minor flaws about yourself that underscore your humanness and can be distributed among multiple drafts.  The key here is to make sure the flaws are consistent with one another.  “Todd is prone to fits of screaming when frustrated” in Draft for Mentor A  doesn’t fit well with “Todd remains disturbingly passive in circumstances that would provoke righteous anger in others” in Draft for Professor B.  A better pairing with Draft A would be, “When Todd is in the room, the level of ambient tension increases markedly.”

Suggestion 2:  Emphasize aspects of your research or scholarship that are likely to be associated with a variety of opinions.  “Not surprisingly, Daphne’s dissertation research on cloning of human infants has been shrouded in secrecy, but I have high hopes for its eventual impact.”  This meshes nicely with “Personally, I have ethical reservations concerning Daphne’s proposal to clone upper-class children in the Hamptons, but there is no arguing with the brilliance of her Bouillon Model for Centrifuge-Based Replication.” 

Suggestion 3:  Speaking of ethics, don’t be shy about pushing the envelope.  Keep in mind that the very act of writing these drafts makes you complicit in an unsavory activity.  “Some might call Gavin unethical, but I prefer to see him as transcending conventional discourses of morality in pursuit of transformational knowledge.”  This could be a winning match with, “Is Gavin a bit of an a**hole?  Absolutely, but so were Steve Jobs and General George S. Patton.  Case closed.  You’d be lucky to hire any one of them.”

Suggestion 4:  Classroom teaching.  Anything goes here, so don’t worry about it.  “Harriet consistently receives abysmal student evaluations, but keep in mind that she does not pander to students by providing them with crutches such as syllabi, course objectives, or punctuality in showing up for class.  She understands that, ultimately, education is a journey you must take on your own.”  In another draft you can say, “To be sure, all the available evidence indicates that Harriet is a disaster in the classroom.  Not a problem.  She will be coming to you with enough long-term grant support to buy out her salary until global warming turns your campus into a bubbling Petri dish of throbbing organic matter.”

Suggestion 5:  Figure out multiple ways to say you’re altruistic.  “Sheldon is a giver.  Whether it’s helping a colleague jump-start her car in the parking lot when it’s 5 below zero, bailing a drunken advisee out of jail on Homecoming Weekend, or bringing recreational marijuana to the department Christmas party, he’s there for you.  Of course, sometimes he can be too there for you, knocking on your bedroom window at 3:00 am, bearing donuts and ready to discuss the spreadsheet he’s developed for scheduling intro courses.  But that’s just Sheldon: he’s a giver.”  On the other hand, sometimes less can be more: “Sheldon Chicklett is the finest being, human or otherwise, I’ve ever met.”

Well, that should get you started.  Writing multiple drafts of recommendations for yourself isn’t easy, nor should it be.  But don’t forget: once you’re hired or accepted into a doctoral program, you can have your students write their recommendations.  Is that cool or what?  Ultimately, everything evens out.  Isn’t that what the classic song “Will the Circle Be Unbroken?” is all about?  Okay, perhaps not.

Uh-oh.  The University of Alabama at Tuscaloosa has agreed to provide its former Dean of Students with a “neutral reference” for future employment after some of the Dean’s tweets, published by Breitbart News, contributed to his resignation.  

A “neutral reference”?  Really?  

Before you get all uppity and start sputtering that this insipid concept could only come from a state that claims the Alabama red-bellied cooter (a pond turtle) as its official reptile, it must be acknowledged that the legal profession is apparently the true culprit here. 

Essentially, a neutral reference is a mechanism for preventing lawsuits.  Roughly translated, the implicit message of a neutral reference is, “We think this guy is an a**hole and/or incompetent and/or unethical and/or God-knows-what-else, but we’re not going to write any of this down (wink, wink). But we will tell you that he worked here.”

[Please, take a few moments to mop up the hypocrisy-induced barf you just spewed onto your lap.]

On those unfortunate occasions when your institution’s legal counsel has instructed you to write a neutral reference, feel free to use the following sample, provided at no charge by University Life, as a template:

Dear Hiring Committee:

I am neither pleased nor displeased to offer this reference letter regarding Professor Harold Twembly.  On the highway of professional life at our university, Professor Twembly occupies the median strip, where he has parked his 1972 AMC Gremlin and watches the traffic.  His research and scholarship have not advanced the field but, on the other hand, they have not retarded it.  Put another way, he has left his discipline undisturbed; think of his work as ink that disappears as it dries.

Professor Twembly’s students, when they can recall him, describe him as neither a good professor nor a bad one; he’s just “a professor.”  As one senior who took three courses with Professor Twembly wrote on his course evaluation, “he was there.”  End-of-course assessments indicate that his students do not learn anything, but none of them have grown more stupid, except for Vince Yorpelson, a tight end on the school’s football team who experienced three concussions during the Fall semester.   

Outside of class, students report that during visits to Professor Twembly’s office he neither smiles nor frowns.  “Imagine a cantaloupe with a lobotomy,” wrote one junior.  “He never has much to say, which is OK with me.  Really, it’s fine.”  

As a colleague, Professor Twembly is neither helpful nor unhelpful to fellow faculty members.  He just “is.”  He has never encouraged me to do anything, nor has he discouraged me.  In department meetings he radiates a Zen-like presence that resembles a small, odor-free tureen of vegetable broth served at room temperature.

In sum, Professor Twembly can be described as a human organism that has taught at our university for the past seven years.  I hope you have found this reference letter to be neither useful nor counterproductive when making — or not making — a decision — or no decision — concerning Professor Twembly.

There you have it.  No need to thank us.  At University Life, we always have your back.  

 

 

 

Let’s be honest, you knew this was coming.  What we’re referring to here is a New York Times October 7th headline: “Do Works by Men Toppled by #MeToo Belong in the Classroom?” The Times wonders, “should they be canceled — banished from public engagement like some of their creators?” 

Well, the fever is spreading, and the targets are no longer just males accused of sexual misbehavior.  In Topeka, Kansas, the city’s main public library has removed every Dr. Seuss book from its children’s collection.  According to Willard Dwenz, Chief Librarian, it has been recently documented “beyond a shadow of a doubt” that in 1978 Theodor Geisel punched a cat in the face in his home.  The feline, a Persian named Sprinkles, had scratched Geisel’s left arm, but only slightly.  Geisel proceeded to hit Sprinkles so hard with a right hook that he fractured her tiny nose.  Sprinkles never fully regained her sense of smell, and was on anti-depression medication for the rest of her life. 

Says Dwenz:  “After reviewing a videotape of the incident, there was no way we could justify keeping his books on our shelves.  This man, the author of “The Cat in the Hat,” was an abuser of kittens, for God’s sake!”

Or consider Rachel Carson, the acclaimed environmental activist who authored “Silent Spring” and “The Sea Around Us.”  Last month it was revealed that Ms. Carson did not separate paper from plastic when recycling, and thought nothing of tossing hamburger wrappers, half-filled soda cups, and mangled French fries out of her car window when traveling the pristine roads of coastal Maine. 

Responding to this discovery, Bates, Colby, and Bowdoin — all prestigious Maine colleges — announced that they will no longer allow professors to assign Carson’s books in their courses.  In a strongly worded joint statement released on October 10th, the Presidents of the three schools asserted, “it is clear that Rachel Carson was a trash whore whose reprehensible behavior betrayed the ideals she so eloquently wrote about.  She is dead to us as a legitimate commentator on the state of our planet.”

This just in:  The days of “Pride and Prejudice” and “Little Women” may be numbered.  You don’t want to know what University Life recently learned about Jane Austen and Louisa May Alcott.  You’ve got to trust us on this one.  Imagine the worst possible scenario, and then quintuple its depravity.  That wouldn’t begin to describe what these women did…..and then bragged about.  

It is not for us to forgive them.